Guys Night Out
by VampireQueenMinami-SquidKi
Summary: Dante decides to gather his twin brother and teenage comrade for a night out. How will this work out?
1. And We're Off!

This is a fanfic I started a year ago that I found on my laptop. I found it and decided to try and continue it.. maybe. If I have the attention span to. x.x

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Prolog- The Voice

Darkness covered the black sky, it showed of a bad omen in a way. Trickling rain fell from the sky like tears from a mourning maiden. The fairing maiden known as the sky let out a crashing sound of pain.

People ran on the sidewalk, trying to avoid the falling precipitation. They ran into buildings, into subway tunnels; any where they could be sheltered.

Few walked calmly and coolly through the maiden's anger. When people jumped at the sound of the thunder, some people would smirk and, or, snicker. They cuddled their jackets and coats close to them. Or lovers snuggled and held each other for warmth. A young boy was carried in his mother's arms.

It was a cold day indeed.

But one man was nor cold.

He sat in the building with red neon lights that just flickered on. He sat in a wooden chair (his favorite one, mind you), leaning on its back legs and feet propped up on the table.

He held cool smirk on his face and his hands on his neck, tapping his fingers on top of one another. He was bobbing his head to the music that played from his music box which started skipping.

He muttered, not letting the smirk leave his face. "Ehhhh." He moaned followed by a long yawn, "Ain't gonna bother."

A red jacket hung on a coat rack close by, a long with a sword leaning against his desk. Two guns lay side by side on his desk, one black and the other silver.

The neon lights outside blinked, the words said, "Devil May Cry", and it was run by none other then Devil Hunter Dante.

Dante stretched his arms in front of him and cracked his knuckles. Just by his expression you could tell he was bored.

Then again, when wasn't he?

"Man… no calls about demons, no nothing!" He huffed, and crossed his arms over his chest tightly. "Even a kitten in a tree would be fun… damn…" He paused then blurted, "and why am I talking to myself?!"

A little voice in his head answered, "Because you're an idiot?"

"_Moi_" Dante said in a shocked voice, but the sarcasm stuck sharply.

"Yes you." The voice answered. "Go out and do something!"

"Oh? Tell me one my dear little voice."

"Find your own mission!"

"WAAAAY too much work," Dante chuckled and shut his eyes.

"Go out?"

One eye opened with curiosity and an eyebrow shot up. He repeated, "Out?"

The voice piped up, "Yeah if you get what I am saying."

"I don't think the girls would be up," Dante had both eyes open and rubbed his chin, "Neither would the guys, but, what the hell? Why not get the kid!" Dante slid his chair back and let his booted feet hit the ground with a thud.

"That's the spirit!" The voice cheered. Then the voice was silent.

Dante put Ebony and Ivory in his drawer and Rebellion on the wall with care. He grabbed his jacket and flung it over his shoulder, trying to show off a cool imagine.

And that imagine ended horribly wrong.

He hit off the lamp on his desk. The lamp cord was around the phone on his desk and that went tumbling off and fell to the ground hard. The motion of the objects falling reflected to the old, trashy music box and it shut off completely.

Dante had turned and seen the whole thing. His eye twitched slightly. He walked back words out of the shop and into the night without a word.

_Note:_

_Now we all know why Dante acts so dumb at times; he listens to that stupid little voice in his head._

_Maybe the idiotic and childish ways build up so much it made a voice?_

_Major question;_

_Do we wanna know? _


	2. What a World

Nero lay on a couch, his girl Kyrie cuddled in his arms. He used his normal hand to stroke her hair gently, his eyes being shut. Kyrie had her head on his chest, both were as relaxed as can be.

It had been three months since Dante had helped Nero get her back, and Nero hadn't heard from the older man. Then again he didn't really care, at least not at the moment.

The couple had been inseparable since they had gotten together. They spend as much time as they could together.

Which Nero had come down to popping the question to her, he felt the ring box in his back pocket. He shifted softly, careful not for Kyrie to notice. He had kept the ring just in case the moment was right.

He felt it was slightly too soon, but they were smitten with each other. He loved her and she loved him.

_Why not now? _He thought.

"Kyrie?"

"Yes Nero?"

He gently slid his arms from around her and sat up, signaling for Kyrie to get off him (which she did). He got on one knee in front of the couch and gazed up into his woman's eyes.

"Kyrie… I love you, you're my life and I can't put my love for you into words… Kyrie," he reached for the box in his pocket, "will you-?"

"YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" A loud voice boomed.

Nero's eye twitched as his arm fell to the side and his Devil Bringer claws curled.

Just then Dante came in, he saw the couple and his face lit up. "Hey! Sorry if I'm interrupting something-"

_Jackass you ARE! _Nero nearly screamed through his teeth he was grinding so hard.

"-but I need Nero to come with me!"

"Has something happened?" Kyrie asked, her face suddenly becoming worried.

_Kid won't come if I say the truth. _"Scare crows are attacking!"

Nero's eyebrow shot up. Surely he jested. He could easily take them down, even if they were giant ones?

"So come on!" Dante grabbed Nero's arm, lifting him to his feet. "No time to waste!" Dante stepped out of the room and called, "Hurry up!"

Nero mumbled, he turned to Kyrie and pecked her cheek. "Be back, babe." He walked out of the room. He started to go to the room where Red Queen and Blue Rose were in but Dante dragged him out.

Nero shouted out in protest as he was dragged out, leaving a confused Kyrie behind.


	3. Hangover Would Be Nice About Now

Bwwaaaahh~! Sorry to those who are reading this. And thank you all for the reveiws. ^w^ Anyway, I have been having writer's block and couldn't decide what to do. But I've gotten some ideas in store for our trio... hehe...

Anyway, enjoy and some feedback is great! 3

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"..And if you didn't help me save her I would be kicking your ass _right_ into hell!"

The son of Sparda rolled his eyes as he walked with the punk ass kid. Nero was ranting to Dante about how he was going to ask Kyrie to be his wife, how he ruined a moment…

Blah, blah, blah..

"..Even listening to me?!" Nero roared with anger at the older man.

Dante snapped out of his thoughts and waved his hand at the teen's face, a smirk on his face. "Aw kid, don't cha worry. You can get back to you getting your ass laid later!" A hint of tease with his voice sung high.

With a face red from anger and embarrassment he replied, "Who said anything about getting laid you-!"

"Here we are!"

Nero looked. Since his ranting had started he had not noticed where the hell Dante was taking him. His eyes met with a tall gothic looking church. Gargoyles hung from pillars on each side of the building. Their ugly faces seemed to be the cause of the storm that had shortly stopped.

Nero raised an eyebrow. _Something tells me this isn't scarecrows. _He thought with a short spat. As he did he noticed his Devil Bringer giving off a soft glow making his eyes narrow. Something was near and he could feel it.

The question is what?

"Come on kid!" Dante's voice snapped Nero out of his thoughts. He wrinkled his nose as he watched the older man walk in as if he owned the damn place.

Dante was _really_ pissing him off today.

Shortly the younger man followed after him, unaware of whom or what could be inside.

~*~

"Hmm… nothing of importance, but I suppose it shall do." He said.

Shutting the book, he tucked it carefully under his strong arm. His fingers stroke the spines of the many hardback volumes of the underworld; if they were alive they would have shivered by the devil's cold touch.

Vergil's ice toned eyes scanned each title of the demonology and such as he continued to fiddle his fingers on the spines. He took his fingers off and walked to another book shelf. He removed a very thick, worn out book and opened it. He used his other hand to hold it as he read.

He stopped and blinked. He had a feeling as if something, or _someone,_ was watching him. Slowly, he looked up meeting a mirrior image of his face, a goofy grin on it and followed by a loud and bellowing, "HEY BRO!" Which caused him to fall back ass words, the heavy book landing right on his gut forcing an "oof!" out of him and his breath.

Vergil coughed and exhaled a breath back into his lungs. He sat up, pushing the book off. He looked up seeing his younger brother staring down at him with that same grin. God how he _hated _that grin. From the day they were born to the adults they're grown into now. He stood to his feet grumbling swears too quiet for the younger twin to hear.

"Aw I knew you missed me Veeergil~" Dante cooed and pulled his brother into a tight bear hug. Vergil squirmed and shouted in protest at Dante to drop him, but nothing really seemed to work.

Soon the youngest devil hunter entered the room, only to meet the sight of the twins, and being slightly disturbed by the sight. "Um, Dante who is this?" He asked softly.

The red coated demon turned his head and grinned, "This kiddo is my-"

But Dante wasn't able to finish the sentence, he only let out a high pitched yelp as his brother's booted foot met the area below the belt. Vergil couldn't help but grin as Dante slowly let so and landed fast first on the floor. "F-Fucker..." He squeaked.

"Let that be a lesson, _brother._" Vergil chuckled evilly while dusting his coat off.

"...So you're Dante's brother?"

"Correct." He answered, not looking at him.

"His _twin _brother?"

"Correct again."

"...How the hell did you deal with this old fart?"

Vergil's stone eyes met Nero's, making the teen shudder a little. The eldest twin's eyes soon met Nero's Devil Bringer, the light shinning brightly. "Interesting arm you have."

Nero flinched and rolled his coat's sleeve over it. He tried to give his best tough guy glare to show he was not afraid, "I'd prefer if you didn't stare." He hissed.

Vergil could have laughed at the boy's words. The teen didn't scare him- he found lesser demons more of a scare. But he didn't dare say it a loud, for it was wise to never judge a book by it's cover.

"Speaking of book.." He mumbled, glancing to his testicle hurting brother who continued to remain on the floor.

"Son of a bitch..." Dante coughed, his voice still a little high pitch.

"So.. what is it you're wanting to see me for, _little brother_?"

He took his time, but the red coated devil stood letting so of his damaged orchids (at least he _thought _they were still there) he managed to speak. "I wanted to see if you and the kid," He nodded to a sneering Nero, "wanted to have a guy's night out!"

A heavy silence filled the room as Dante tried to keep a grin. But that was soon gone as Nero's Bringer clocked him in the eye with a Buster and Yamato's hilt smashing him in the jaw. The silver haired wonder fell back, twitching.

"YOU GOT IN THE WAY OF KYRIE AND I BECAUSE OF THIS?!" Nero roared. He was tempted to hit again with everything he had.

Vergil's voice was calm and even as he spoke, "I don't have time for ridiculous little things."

The two two turned and began to walk off, but Dante chuckled devilishly, making the two stop and look back toward the red coated man. They shared uneasy glances at each other and back to Dante, watching him rise to his feet ever so slow.

"You two.. have stepped _right _into **Dante's inferno**!" He laughed loudly. Vergil gave a hard facepalm while Nero just stared at him.

"You fool!" Vergil spoke, moving his fingers a part to stare at his sibling. "Do you even know _what-_"

Dante reaching into his coat and pulled out two long, pale colored envelopes from hidden pockets within his coat. He used both his index fingers to open them, while a flick of the wrist sent both letters on an airmail trip to the devil boys. Both caught them, dumbfounded looks on their faces. In unison, both pulled out neatly folded letters, opened them out and read the familiar words on the paper.

_Why is it.. _Vergil pondered.

_..this handwritting and wording.. _Nero finished the next thought.

_..seem familiar? _They thought a like. At the bottom, both noticed their signatures as if signing a deal. Suddenly both realized.

It was their apartment/house's lease.

"WHY DO YOU HAVE A COPY OF THIS?!" Both shouted together loudly.

"I just so happen to have the real ones..." Dante grinned, "And if you don't do what I say.. well, let's just say you and Kyrie can kiss that nice apartment- bro, same goes with your big house-" He sliced his index finger along the bottom of his neck, making a nasty clicking sound. "Goodbye, _ciao, _and _Au revior."_

"Wait, what do you mean by that?!" Nero roared, panicing.

"I can meet up with your 'owners' and 'convince' them."

"You would not _dare_!" Vergil growled.

"Oh I would, big bro, I would. All you two gotta do is just follow, little ol' me to the places I wanna go." Dante explained, giving a wink.

The two groaned as their heads hung. Neither were in the mood for this; nor did they want to be around Dante. It had also been storming all week on and off, the temperature was chilling enough to make Jack Frost move, and each had their own plans for this evening. But both couldn't afford to loose their places. Vergil was barely making a cut and Kyrie would surely kill Nero!

The eldest son and Bringer wielder exchanged emotion filled glances and groaned.

"So are we in gang?"

Both turned to Dante, fist pumping with an unenthusiastic, "Yay.."

Clasping his hands together, Dante's eyes lit up. He jogged past the two, letting his hands go free and grabbing them by the tails of their coats. Red aura swirled around him, as he unleashed his Devil Trigger. The two looked back eyes wide.

Nero sputtered quickly, "Wh-what are you-"

"-doing?!" Vergil finished, his tone chilling.

Wings sprouted from the red devil's back, pumping and beating making him rise in the air. He flew up at lightening speed. The two other silver haired males were being dragged behind like rag dolls, hollering and protesting at the 'idiot' to halt. But unfortunate truth this was Dante, he did not.

He sored out the door he and Nero had entered and left open, flying out into the cloudy sky.

~*~

"Hey bartender.. a-another drink!"

The man behind the counter poured alcohol into the red coated man's glass. Dante picked up his glass, shooting down another drink. He hiccuped and giggled like a schoolgirl. Nero stared at Dante in disbelief. _This _had been the man who helped him save his home? God, either Nero didn't look at Dante hard enough or the red devil pulled the whool over everyone's eyes too well. He shook off the thought and took a small sip of his own alcholic beferage. He groaned as he felt a little curl of his hair stick up. He used his Devil arm to flatten it.

Dante had flown around the whole damn city dragging Vergil and him in the air. By the time they arrived in the bar, it was late (around midnight Nero guessed) and the bars were hopping. But he was thankful Dante picked a very small and local bar.

Besides the three snow haired trio, a few women at a table in a corner and the bartender were there. He watched from the corner of his eye as the bartender cleaned a mug glass with his apron. Was that even hygienic?

The bartender looked up, Nero quickly dodging his eyes from him and staring at the wooden bar they sat at. "So enjoying that tea?" He asked Vergil, his voice slightly akward.

Vergil sat between the teen and young silbing. He had a tea cup under a small plate that matched the pattern around the sides. He gave a slight nod, taking a small sip. "I can rarely get people to drink that stuff," Barked the bartnder with a hearty laugh.

The icy devil pulled the cup from his lips, setting it elegently on the plate. "I will agree it is good." He said, that same blank look apon his face.

The two continued the small talk, but were unaware of Dante staring at Vergil. He snickered as he watched his brother; so tickled at how much he reminded him of their father! They had the same hair style and drunk tea. But he pouted out how he didn't wear a monical or dressed in that deep violet their dad had worn.

He decided to take care of that.

"Veeeergil~" Dante's voice slurred as he wrapped an arm around his brother's now stiffened shoulders, "D-Did I ever mention how... how much you... uh.. you look like dad?"

A small shudder quaked from the older twin's body, "Um.. I do not believe so..?"

"Totally!" The drunk barked, sounding like a teenage girl. "Y-You just need lots of purple... like like that dinosaur.. um... BARNEY!"

Vergil's blank face lit up with rage. "Now see here! Do _not _compare our father to that unpleasent looking reptile- he was a great man with great vaule!"

"Pfffft.. yeah yeah.."

"Dante get a hold of yourself before I-"

Nero tapped Vergil on the shoulder, the eldest twin looking toward him. "By the way, who was your father?"

"If you _must _know young Nero, he was-"

"VEEEERGIL!" Dante whinned, tugging his brother's sleeve. His brother's head snapped back, eyes blazing mad.

"WHAT?!"

"...T-To look like dad.. you need one eye..~"

"E-Excuse me?"

"Yeah!" Dante slurred, japping his finger into Vergil's right eye. The 'Sparda cosplayer' yelled out in pain and fell backwords out of the barstool, rolling around.

"BROTHER!" Dante got on his knees and scooped his brother into his arms, rocking him. "I-I DIDN'T MEAN TO-TO HURT YOU!" He hiccuped. "I-I promise-!" Another hiccup. "Th-that we'll always be together.. an-and go to games," Hiccup again. "..and play Battleship, and watch movies," Double hiccups, but he continued to talk, "and fight demons together, and.."

As Dante continued his ramble, the youngest of the three has turned to watch. Due to the commotion the women had left, leaving him and the bartender to just stare. Nero gave a heavy sigh and turned around to thim. "Get me a whisky."

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Wow I've made Dante _nuts _in this story. *Stares* ...thanks for reading! 8D

Btw Dante's Inferno is a book(I believe)/game/anime. Rings of hell... Devils.. demons..? ^_^;; Horrible joke I know, but I had to throw it in there. *Wishes she had a PS3* ;_; Oh well...


	4. We're No Strangers to Headaches!

A merry tune arose from the drunk devil- swinging his arms around wildly. "Everywhere I go~ bitches always know~ Dante's got a weeenie that he lov-" His song was interrupted by a hiccup, but he continued right along, "looooves t-to shooow~" He slurred very loudly and off-key.

"Since when does _he_ listen to Hollywood Undead?" Nero blinked, as he walked behind the silver haired wonder of the world. Nero's hands were stuck deeply into the pockets of his coat. He shivered at the cold night, pulling his red hood over his head to get some warmth to his ears. A soft groan made him glance from the corner of his eye, seeing the eldest twin rubbing the eye Dante had poked out.

After the little even at the bar, Nero and Vergil both angrily dragged Dante out. Before that they told the bartender to bill the devil hunter. The two had decided it wasn't safe to leave the idiot alone: with the fact he was drunk as hell, _and _kept their important papers' with the deeds to their living space. "Some lives could be saved." Nero said to Vergil, trying to lighten up the mood. But his comment was ignored.

"How's the eye?" Nero squeaked over Dante's horrible cover of a Toby Keith song. Nero didn't know which scared him more- the fact he _knew _the song or that the bastard sang it _too_ well.

Vergil's other eye glared over at Nero. His reply was too low and muffled by his palm, that the Bringer wielder couldn't understand him. He decided it might be best to leave it at that.

Besides Dante's singing, they walked in silence. The air was cold and thick, their breath visible in the night. Vergil suddenly it broke by stating angrily, "Wrong eye.."

Nero turned his head to face Vergil, "Zah?"

"Idiot poked out the wrong damn eye.." Vergil said, as he removed his hand. His eye was a bit red and puffy, but it began to go down and regain it's color. Vergil silently thanked the lord of hell for demonic blood.

Nero didn't reply back. Hell he didn't know _what _to say. Did he want Dante to jab out his other eye? He wondered. Vergil seemed like too much of a noble, high and mighty fellow for his taste. It was bad enough having to walk with the guy; he reekedof demonic pride.

Speaking of which, Nero cleared his throat to get Vergil's attention. "Back at the bar, you never answered my question."

"Oh yes," Vergil said quickly, clearing his own throat to speak. "Years ago, a war raged," His tone growing serious, "Our father was a demon-"

"Gee, I _couldn't_ tell captain obvious." The teen scoffed, blowing a lock of hair from over his right eye. Vergil glared but continued.

"As I was _saying,_" Vergil snapped, his voice snooty. "He was a demon of great honor and power. He was the legendary-!"

Nero blinked and next thing he knew is that Vergil was on the ground, holding his face. The words he said would have made a sailor wince. Nero blinked quickly. His eyes lead up a shadow that covered the blue devil, to meet his opposite. Dante stood over Vergil, swaying side to side like a ship at sea. "I... um...I-I jusssst re-rememememebered!" Dante's voice hiccuped.

"WHAT?!" Vergil screeched, making Nero jump a bit.

"...I got the right eye this time!"

~*~

Once again Nero and Vergil dragged Dante off. The threesome came to a small park to rest a little. Nero and Vergil sat down on a wooden bench under a streetlight to plan their next step. For a bit they watched Dante dance around a tree humming some song about a lost love. "Best place he would keep our paper work is at his desk," Nero suggested as Vergil nodded in agreement. "So," He lowered his voice, "We head back to Devil May Cry and get the papers from the shop."

Again Vergil nodded and spoke back, "How are we to explain why we're at his shop?"

Nero shrugged. "I don't think he'll care. He's too drunk to tell his hairy ass from his chin."

"...point taken." The eldest twin grunted, disturbed by that thought.

~*~

The three hunters soon found themselves in front of Devil May Cry. The neon lights flashed and flickered brightly as they neared it. Like Nero had said, Dante wasn't giving two shits of a piss to care. By this time he was moaning to lie down and sleep. Vergil shushed him and demanded the keys to open the shop. Dante patted himself and reached his hands into his pockets. "Uh-oh.." Was all he said. The two turned back to the hungover Dante, who groaned irritably. Nero cocked an eyebrow up as Vergil eyed him suspiciously.

When the red devil didn't answer, his team asked in unison, "What?"

"Um.. I-I think.." Dante hiccuped a little, still slightly drunk. His eyes were blood shot and dark rings circled his eyes. He pulled his pockets out, showing they were empty but seemed normal.

Expect for a rather large hole in his right pocket...

"Please tell me that isn't the pocket you keep your keys in, gramps." Nero said, holding back the urge to give him another smack across the face, homeless or not.

Dante gave a sheepish chuckle, tucking his pockets in. He ran one hand through his hair as he talked. "Fine; I never kiss and tell."

"...." An awkward silence filled them. No sound was made, expect for in the distance a dog barked.

~*~

_You wouldn't get this from any other guy_

_I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling._

_Gonna make you understand.._

A soft but angry groaned came from under the covers. A slender, female arm reached out to an alarm clock hitting it.

_Never Gonna give you up_

_Never gonna let you down_

_Never gonna run around and desert you._

"..the fuck?" A dark haired woman popped her head out from the covers. Her eyes twitched in the darkness, seeing it was almost three in the morning. She growled, cursing as she noticed her cell phone lighting up as it played music.

_Never Gonna make you cry_

_Never Gonna make you say goo-_

She flipped it open without looking at the name, her drowsy voice said, "Hello?"

"Lady?" A male's voice squeaked over the phone.

Mary's eyes opened half way, grunting in response. That voice sounded familiar. Who was it? Oh yeah that kid. What was his name, Nero? "Um, _yes_?" She half scoffed.

"We kinda need help. You see-"

"_We_?" Lady snapped, "You know what the time is right now?! I have better crap to do than listen to some kid's sob story an-" She paused at the sound of an siren going off in the background. "What the hell is that?"

This time it was Nero's turn to go off. "Uh, yeah, kinda what I was gonna tell you!" He snapped right back, making Lady sit up. He began to quickly summarize what Dante had done to him and Vergil.

"Okay so you got locked out? Why are their police and ambulance in the background?!" The female asked.

A deep breath was inhaled as Nero spoke so quick Lady had difficulty keeping up. "Well Vergil thought about breaking down the door but Dante has an alarm system in the house. He didn't want to set it off and get the cops up his ass, _so _the drunk bastard decides to climb the second story window and unlock the door from the inside. He slipped, fell and landed on a picket fence by the other buildings house. A lady next door saw, called the cops about someone breaking in, by the time they got here the fence was _right _through his gut and they called an ambulance." Nero coughed, trying to catch his breath. He continued on more slow this time.

"And Vergil?" She asked.

"I.. I don't know," She heard Nero scoff. "As soon as the ambulance came he just vanished." A shuffling sound came from the other side. She guessed Nero was looking around to see if he could spot the blue devil. "Yeah," He confirmed, "He's gone."

"Oh." Lady nodded and thought about the events Nero had explained. "Wait where's Dante?" Lady asked, suddenly worried for the idiot.

"Um.. he's still stuck on the fence." On the other end, Nero looked from the pay phone he was in, watching as some human doctors trying to lift Dante off the fence. They stopped each time as he yelped loudly, making them panic and stopping. Nero wrinkled his nose, knowing damn well he wasn't feeling a thing.

"How's he stuck?!" Lady roared over the line.

"...In his head."

* * *

Hey you... yeah you- you got Rick Roll'd; fanfic style. w Anywho! Well that's that!.. Hmm I'm having writer's block for this now; should I end it here or continue more? Meh, I suppose I will see what you all say! ^w^ Reviews are loved and thank you for reading!

Lyrics

Never Gonna Give You Up - Rick Astley.


	5. Deja Vu?

"Hey babe, mind getting me another drink?"

The golden haired mistress glanced over his slim shoulder to Dante, giving a small smile. "Sure." She strolled over to the red coated hunter, taking his glass and u-turning to the kitchen. "You seem awfully out of tune this morning," She called to him. "What's the deal?"

As she returned back with a glass full of water, Dante grinned weakly at her. "Well- let's just say I had a wild night."

Trish sat on his desk, setting his water down in front of him."Oh?" She asked, watching him guzzle down the cool liquid. "I guess it explains that," She pointed her black finger nail to bandages tied around his bare muscular chest. The lower area of the bandages were red with dried blood. Her head cocked to the side while an eyebrow went up, "What on earth did you do, Dante?"

Dante set the glass down, getting into his signature position- feet on desk and leaning back in chair- and cleared his throat loudly to stall, "I just had a little.." He stopped, to pick his words carefully. "run in, I suppose you could say."

"Hm," Trish pursed her lips together, trying to read the man's face. She shrugged it off and stood, walking back over to the wooden table she was dusting off for Dante. "By the way, Lady called while you were passed out."

It was around three in the afternoon. Trish had come in to check on Dante, like she did every now and then, only to find the son of Sparda passed out in his room. He awoke with a slight hangover- for whatever reason it was- and took over his calls for him until he was back on the saddle. Dante couldn't help but be suspicious of her today. She was nice.

A little _too _nice.

_Maybe she's admitting her love for me,_ He thought, grinning wider at the thought.

"So what did she call about?" Dante said, finally answering her question.

"She said to check on you."

A dumbfounded look crossed his face, "Check on me?" He blurted.

Trish shrugged, just as confused as he was. "I told her you would call her back whenever you got a chance to-" She stopped scrubbing the table with the white cloth and glanced to the door, falling silent. Her sharp eyes glanced back to the devil, seeing him reading through a magazine and probably wasn't listening to her. Dropping the cloth on the smooth table, she stretched while uttering a tiny, but loud enough to hear, yawn. "Boy, I'm tired.."

"You can nap in the guest bedroom," Dante offered, not bothering to look up. "'Course you can always," She could almost picture that grin hidding behind the pages, "sleep in _my _bed and I'll join you for some strawberries and-"

"I'll pass on_ that_," She grunted, drifting out of the room, and passing a disappointed Dante. He shrugged and continued to read.

As soon as she was out, the front door opened. A cool breeze from the previous night blew against Dante's bare chest, making him shiver. "We're closed," He said loudly, not wanting to work at the moment. He turned a page and began to read an article about some upcoming band.

But before he knew what was happening, a blue streak of light flew at him, pinning him to the wall. The magazine fell like a feather to the ground. Dant winced, feeling his wound opening up slightly. His eyes fell, seeing the faded red become a darker crimson. Nero's Bringer tightened around him as he entered with Dante's mirror image following behind.

"The hell, kid?!" Dante roared, not wanting _this_ sort of surprise in the morning.

Neither of them said anything. They took quick glances at one another, giving a quick nod, and faced Dante. Nero lowering the red devil to their height quickly and stood right in front of him. The air between the trio was heavy and thick, as was the silence. The eldest slayer and youngest twin of the two narrowed his blue eyes, trying to despiser what was happening.

Vergil stuck a hand into his coat deeply, pulling out paper folded to look like an envelope. "This," He hissed, "is the rights to the shop. I got them from your friend Enzo."

Dante blinked, his eyes slightly wide. _Unbelievable!_ Why would they suddenly take the rights to _his _shop?! _I'll kill that grease ball later, _Dante growled quietly, imaging the ways to hurt Enzo. Starting with his 'pride.'

"And this," Nero said, Dante's attention and eyes meeting the kid. He watched him reach into his coat's pocket pulling out- _what sort of joke is this_- coupons?

No- they were just as important as anything. Love Planet _and _free pizza coupons; his secret stash! He mentally kicked himself in the arse for leaving it with- once again- Enzo. Another thing to smash him in his Italian pride for.

"You... you bastards!" Dante shouted only to see wicked grins on their faces. He swore he saw a red twinkle in their eyes. "How could you?!"

"Let us just say it is.. a make up for last night," Vergil uttered.

Dante's face was twisted from rage to completely thrown off. "Wait... last night?"

"Don't act stupid!" Vergil snapped, suddenly loosing his cool and calm image. Nero twitched, finding Vergil the most horrifying and creepiest man on earth. Vergil continued on, his face growing dark. "You know exactly what the hell we are talking about! Dragging us out on the town and wasting Nero and I's time..."

"I wasn't even with you guys!" Dante snapped back, growling. "I _was _gonna come get you guys, but... I had a run in with some gangsters.." He muttered the last part quietly, ashamed at the fact he was caught off by average humans. _Mad Dog would turn in his grave. _Dante thought, bitterly.

Suddenly, in horror, Dante watched as Nero and Vergil ripped the papers and coupons into irreplaceable pieces. A high pitch shriek escaped Dante's opened jaw. Nero's Buster withdrew, dropping the youngest twin to his knees. Dante crawled to the papers, trying to catch and collect them. He blubbered uncontrollably(if this were an anime, chibi tears would have filled his eyes).

Vergil and Nero turned away, feeling accomplished. But Nero didn't. He glanced back to Dante as they exited, seeing the old man's head hung while grumbling.

Was that a tear he saw?

"What if it really wasn't him?" Nero asked the blue devil as they came out into the afternoon sun. He turned to face Vergil, "What if he actually told the truth?"

"Who else would have it been?" Vergil scoffed, his eyes shut. "If it were someone else we would have sensed it. Or at least _I _would have."

A vain popped up on Nero's temple, trying to edge himself away from wanting to smack Vergil. _You're both jerks that's for sure... _He thought.

But the two would have never found out what really happened. Indeed, Dante told the truth. He was jumped and after words went to a bar to drink off the humiliation of being caught off guard by a lowly gang. He bar hopped throughout most of the night and did not return home until the sun started to rise.

Seeing everything that happened, Trish chuckled, walking into the guest room. A mirror hung on the wall, reflecting the light coming from the window on the north side of the room. She walked to it, her eyes scanning up and down it. She stroked a slightly invisible scar along her gut. "Too easy." She began twirling with grace, as if she were a dancer. Her golden hair began to change color and began to shrivel up to toward her head. Her tight black leather pants hued to a bright crimson and became loose, while her midnight sky bust became a red vest and a some what lighter black. She turned to face the mirror, smiling back to the reflection of Dante. She reached on a coat hanger, putting on Dante's coat.

"I dress to impress," 'Dante' chuckled, fixing the sleeves.

* * *

Note: Enzo is a character from the Devil May Cry manga. Mad Dog is also a character from the first DMC book(Just thought I'd point that out for those you didn't understand). I own none of these characters! :U

Well that's all folks! Sorry if the ending sucked, but it kinda popped into my head and I thought, "Why the hell not!" Thanks readers for the reviews and taking your time to read this!


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